A couple of years back I was frequently associating with a British magistrate. He was intelligent, charming and engaging however I learned precisely nothing regarding sentencing from him.
It would seem that sentencing is broadly a foregone conclusion in real court cases.
That is to say that the margins within which one can make a judgement regarding sentencing are so narrow, that there really isn’t much scope for artistry at all.
Disciplinarians, on the other hand, a few ‘hard limits’ aside, (three in my case; no breath control, no upside-down shenanigans and no permanent damage), have more or less free rein.
Very nearly ‘carte blanche’ to do as he sees fit.
My schooling in all things sentencing came whilst I was being sentenced for a minor infraction on social media.
I’d never really given it much thought before as I am exclusively submissive on the corporal punishment/discipline front. That is to say; I most certainly do not switch. I know which team I am on.
Never once had I wondered how my dominant or my disciplinarian came to their decisions on discipline.
I’d laboured under the false pretence that The Bigs have a pile of dreamed-up punishments, a bit like a bucket list, ready to dish out at their very next opportunity.
Likely, they spend ages cooking up the next disciplinary that they will conduct - probably lots of fussing with implements and many a cliché such as: “This is going to hurt me far more than it is going to hurt you, young lady.”
[Cue: ENORMOUS eye roll!]
This misconception was shattered by my French teacher who, when sentencing me for the very first time, gave a stunning explanation of his thought process behind the decision making.
It was all I could do to not stand there, mouth open in shock, looking gormless!
Before I share his impressive monologue, I must first point out that I am sure many dominants and disciplinarians *do* simply dish out their day-dream punishments however, the best are far more diligent.
They wish to ensure that discipline is reasonable and proportionate and not necessarily for compassionate reasons alone.
Practicality is an important component of punishment.
If the punishment doesn’t fit the crime, then resentment can never be far away and punishment is only ever truly effective when it comes from a place of love.
Which is why corny sounding lines such as ‘… this is going to hurt me more than it is going to hurt you’ are actually not as wide of the mark as you might think.
I’ve never actually had that one said to me; however, I have had something markedly similar which absolutely came from the heart and I shall share that with you shortly.
First, allow me so share with you ‘wisdom from the bench’.
“Now, there are two things I must take into consideration when making a judgement. Number one is intention; what was your motivation? Number two is outcome; what were the consequences of the action or actions taken? Outcome is worth double intent. So, if the outcome is bad, then the thrashing will be severe even if the intentions were good. If both the intention and outcome are bad, then we would be talking about some very serious discipline. In this case, I know that your intention wasn’t bad, and that the outcome wasn’t terrible either. The other student whom you might have offended, wasn’t at all perturbed by your quip. I know because I discreetly checked in with her and she was okay with it. However, it doesn’t absolve you of your error of judgement. You could have caused bad feeling and for this you will be punished. Do you understand?”
How about that for ‘off the top of his head’ during a pressure situation?
I have to say that in spite of my genuine trepidation regarding the impending thrashing for misconduct, I was still able to drink in and appreciate my disciplinarian’s artistry.
This was the spoken and not the written word AND it just so happened to be in the gentleman’s second language to boot!
I couldn’t have said it that well in my first.
He was calm, measured and incisive. I shall never forget it.
[I got 12 with the strap, for those who are itching to know and you can read the full story here: https://jacquijames.substack.com/p/online-conduct]
There was pressure on the both of us.
As this was the first time that physical discipline had been called for in our student/teacher relationship, I was under pressure to prove my sincerity regarding my willingness to accept corporal punishment and he was under pressure to prove himself fair, reasonable and professional.
To give him every credit that he is due, he had the additional discomfort of requiring my HoH’s assistance in administering the discipline due to problems of geography.
Now, that takes courage and his brevity in such a situation didn’t pass me by.
As in all peak experiences there was also a twist!
When handing sentencing down, it was done so with a little flourish.
“So, as you’re not a fan of metric; as you’re NOT a fan of metric, I’m going to give you twelve with the strap. And, if you do it again, it will be worse for you.” He continued, “I will send you a punishment reflection form to fill in afterwards, and I will want two-hundred words on the importance of politeness and manners.”
It wasn’t enough that I was to be strapped for what amounted to an online quip, sir simply had to let me know that had I not mouthed off about the unsophisticated nature of the metric system a couple of days back, then it would have spared me two whole strokes.
Alas, he set an imperial punishment ‘in imperial’.
If I am to be wholly truthful here, then I have to admit that I had most certainly ‘had enough’ by ten lashes of the house strap:
Those two ‘extras’ really did count. Why? Because I knew full-well that other girls would have been let off with ten - the metric number that would ordinarily be sir’s go-to for relatively minor misdemeanours.
The additional paperwork, on top of the copious amount of homework that he always set, was another feature of his intellectual prowess. Paperwork isn’t only dreary to a high functioning and extremely busy person; it is almost worse than a strapping.
The humiliation of having to write about politeness and manners was exquisite and excruciating in equal measure. However, the pièce de résistance was that those words must be written by hand.
He might as well have asked for them in blood.
This is what the art of sentencing is truly about; it must be intensely personal if its full effect is to be felt. The purpose of punishment isn’t only punitive, it must also have an element of deterrent as well as an element of reparation.
Sentencing is a true art form.
Despite being exceedingly hot and sore, post discipline, I was still fully in awe of the gentleman’s artistry and knowing that I had witnessed something special, something out of the ordinary, I immediately took down detailed notes post thrashing.
It was the personalised nature of the discipline that spoke volumes about my disciplinarian’s character.
He’d thought about it.
The punishment was prescribed with care and attention to detail and for those reasons it was far more effective than just any old thrashing (of which I’ve had plenty).
It speaks volumes that I am still writing about it now - almost three years later.
That is the power of physical discipline when it comes from a place of love. You have to care for the people you punish or else the punishment will not have the desired effect and it ceases to be punishment.
Much mirth has been made of cane wielding teacher types who say funny things right before caning a miscreant’s backside.
My experience of such clichés is actually starkly different.
“You’re smart, Jacqui. So, don’t make it necessary. It’s unpleasant for both of us.”
He meant it too.
That time, I had been the recipient of a stiff 12-stroke caning for being two-minutes late to my lesson and for very late submission of homework.
I’d originally been sentenced to 8-strokes but my HoH talked my teacher into upping it to 12 because my HoH had been warning me all morning to not be late.
[I wrote that epic up in SIX OF THE BEST 2020].
My disciplinarian was both earnest and precise in his choice of words and though those who weren’t present may well mock, being there in the room at the time is a very different story.
Corporal punishment should have an effect on both parties, that is where its power truly lies.
Here’s an excerpt from the very end of that particular encounter.
“Next time we see each other I hope we can do without the punitive aspects of the student/teacher relationship.”
“Yes, sir.” I said with more than a hint of guilt.
“I will email you the homework exercises tonight. I expect them to be delivered on time, or we can have another chat with your HoH and his cane.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Do your work, be on time, and we’ll have no further trouble.”
“Yes, sir. Thank you.” I replied resolving to never fail at these things again. Ever.
Always measured, always calm and therefore always in ultimate control.
Sentencing is an art to be learned, perfected and used. Deep thought ought to go into it and punishment must always come from a place of love, care and concern for the individual who is to be disciplined.
One size fits nobody and this is precisely why I learned far more about the art of sentencing from a disciplinarian than I did from a magistrate.
Jacqui James
Live~Lash~Love