Maintenance is a controversial topic in some quarters and perhaps with good reason. Is it fair and just that corporal punishment be administered to a recipient without a specific offence having been committed?
It would seem that there is a clear division between those who argue in defence of maintenance, (and those of us who practice it), and those who are adamant that it shouldn’t feature as part of a Domestic Discipline relationship.
Typically, the split is more or less down the lines of disciplinarian vs disciplinee.
Naturally, it is those who would receive the discipline who howl the loudest about this misunderstood practice and, though I should like to, it is hard to blame them.
Bending over and having one’s lower garments removed for painful discipline to be applied - without an incident having taken place - is certainly worse than when one knows that one is in the wrong over something or other.
Being punished for failure is logical, often necessary and some might even say critical for future development. If the miscreant can associate specific shortcomings with painful consequences, then there is plenty of mainstream evidence that supports the idea that there are serious learning benefits of such actions and consequences.
However, when there is no misdeed, no crime or other mishap to account for, it can seem perplexing - if not, downright outrageous - that discipline is administered anyway.
I can personally attest that a maintenance thrashing - pound for pound - is more difficult to endure than a punishment thrashing.
All things being equal: implements, number of strokes, state of undress, target area and, of course; hot or cold spanking; it is always more difficult to stay down and tolerate the discipline given for maintenance.
It is as though a maintenance thrashing actually hurts more because there is ‘no reason for it’.
Though I loathe the word ‘deserve’ for a whole galaxy of reasons, I’m afraid to say that this does appear to play a large part in the ability to willingly accept routine maintenance or not.
Those who are terribly concerned with ‘deserve’ - that is to say, do I really deserve this or that treatment - are, generally speaking, against maintenance and will find it harder to receive… or even deliver should they find themselves in these circumstances.
My Head of House sometimes struggles with the ‘deserve’ aspect of maintenance. He’s stated previously that he finds it somewhat difficult to administer, especially when I’ve had a good week and done well. He doesn’t want to diminish the power nor seriousness of corporal punishment by dishing it out without ‘just cause’. He also has no wish to hurt me unless it is for a very good reason.
So, the imp in me would simply call him a rude name and then he has his precious ‘just cause’ and we are away!
However, ‘topping from the bottom’ is rightly frowned upon in almost all quarters. Therefore, I am left to reason with my HoH.
I’m one of the very few (possibly even the only!) submissive who is in absolute favour of weekly maintenance without fail nor excuse.
[In fact, if you are a fellow genuine disciplinee (not funishment enthusiast!) and are also a recipient of regular maintenance thrashings (not merely a ‘theoretically in favour of’ one), then do please get in touch - it will be a pleasure, and a wonder, to e-meet you!]
The arguments in favour of regular discipline sessions for maintenance purposes are broadly as follows.
Number one, prevention is better than cure. Which is to say that a regular spanking usually ensures that the disciplinee doesn’t get up to any serious mischief. It’s not unlike quenching one’s thirst with a tall glass of water before you crack open the expensive Chablis. No sensible person wants to quaff a whole bottle of Chablis in order to simply alleviate thirst! A maintenance thrashing is akin to wetting one’s whistle - sating whatever urges (or genuine needs) one might have for discipline but without the raging hangover afterwards (or rather, a six-bar gate in our parlance!).
Number two, we cannot remember pain. It is far better to be frequently reminded of just how much genuine Corporal Punishment hurts so that one doesn’t go about as though racking up a cricket score won’t matter. It will. They say that pain is hard to remember properly and therefore consistent reminders assist in deterring one from earning a more severe punishment.
Number three, it’s good to be reminded who’s boss. During the course of everyday married life, it can sometimes be difficult to keep one’s relationship hierarchy in the front of one’s mind. Both parties can be equally guilty of this. For example, although I am the submissive at home, I am dominant in the work place (and highly capable too), so that frequently spills over into our home life. If sir has forgotten to take the bins out, it is very easy for me to forget that I am not admonishing a very junior member of my staff(!) On the other hand, when my HoH sees me perform well in the course of executing my business duties, he finds it more difficult to take me to task over forgetting to empty the dishwasher.
Therefore, a weekly maintenance session enables us to reaffirm the proper order in our household, to reconnect properly and to allow us both to let go of any ‘outside influences’ that are unhelpful to our traditional relationship.
There may well be other arguments in favour also, however these are my top three and I constantly remind my HoH of them so that instead of allowing maintenance to slide by and bigger problems to grow, we take full advantage of my willingness to accept what others see as ‘unfair or unfocussed discipline’.
On the contrary, although no specific offence has been committed, (and if it has, I receive the punishment for that immediately after maintenance - which is yet another long-term benefit for both disciplinarian and disciplinee), I assert that this is the upmost focussed use of discipline - what could be better than preventing a build-up of poor behaviour which might culminate in a truly terrible thrashing which we both have to then endure?
Furthermore, I view it is unfair to not be provided with maintenance. My argument is that I need it to succeed, to keep me on track and to help me to ensure that the most severe discipline is either rare or unnecessary.
What is neglect if it isn’t being provided with one’s genuine needs?
It is true that my needs might be vanishingly different to yours but they are needs nonetheless and why should I be denied that which I require to thrive just because others hold a different view?
Bottom line?
As ever, it is very much different strokes for different folks but I would challenge anyone who has a strong opinion against maintenance thrashings as part of a DD relationship to read this article, in full, and to state his or her case.
For me, maintenance is central to DD relationships. The sooner the submissive realises that regular discipline actually helps her to: earn less punishment in the long run, to keep on top of her duties and to enable her to maintain a much more harmonious household, the better for all concerned.
For those new to the idea of maintenance, here is one session I wrote up a good while back - a genuine discipline session ‘for no reason’ - https://jacquijames.substack.com/p/maintenance-day
Jacqui James
Live-Lash-Love
That was from the “ARTICLES” section of my website, more of which can be found here: https://jacquijames.substack.com/s/articles
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https://jacquijames.substack.com/s/domestic-discipline
[ALL materials ©Jacqui James 2024]
I am unhesitatingly and firmly in favour of weekly maintenance. I agree fully with all your three principal arguments for maintenance. But, most importantly, it works!
I'm required to request discipline when I haven't earned any and need some.